Oh man, I feel for you....Not even remotely funny!

 

Alright, I have two, but I'll tell you this one.

I have a three car garage. The TT is in the single car side and I normally park my Impala in the driveway behind the TT. My GF parked her Escalade in the two car garage on the right side of my truck. One day for some reason I parked the Impala in the driveway behind my truck. I asked my GF to drive her Escalade because my truck was blocked by my Impala. Before she gives me the keys she says, "Dont wreck it." I look at her in disbelief and say, "Yeah, whatever."

I turn the stereo up really loud and I'm backing her Escalade out really slow and looking to the right to make sure her passenger side mirror doesn't hit the doorframe of the garage. As I clear the doorframe of the garage the car stops and I think I wasn't giving it enough gas, so I gas it a little more and it lurches, then stops and won't move. Suddenly I realized where I parked the Impala and when I looked back to the left I saw I had sideswiped it. The bumper of the Escalade just dug into the passenger side of the Impala.

Now, I'm feeling really stupid. So I go inside and tell her and she comes outside to survey the damage and just laughs her tail off. Bottom line
damage, Caddie $1100.00, Impala 2500.00. I pay out of pocket to keep my insurance low.
Oh, It gets better. Two weeks later, Her car is fixed and so is mine. I remember to park the Impala behind the TT. I'm backing my truck out the garage and I'm looking to my right paying special attention not to hit her Caddie. I back out and come too close to the doorframe and jam my driver's side mirror against the doorframe. I pull forward and it comes off. I can't f#$%king believe it! I can't tell her this because I know she'll tease me forever, so I drive to the store with my mirror hanging by cables. When I get back home I tell her someone hit me in the store parking lot. I haven't been in an accident since 1997 (another stupid move on my part) and this **** happens while I'm backing out of my garage. This is stupid driving.

 

Wow that was way better then mine....

Ok I have one more. I installed a BM short throw kit on my TT, I take out the center console,E-brake cover and ashtray.I place the console in a nice safe place and the other two parts I simply moved to the rear of the car so i didn't step on them.So yea I am all horny to try out the new shifter and I go to leave to test drive it.Yup you guessed it I run over both almost new Carbon fiber e-brake cover and ashtray....So another dumb *** move by this guy

 

Ding, ding, ding...we have a winner: Onetime!


Man, I am feeling SO much better.

A

 

I was at breakfast this morning and I went to drink my orange juice and it was grapefruit. I hate it when that happens.

 

 

I backed into a smoothie king support pillar (scottsdale) in my new to me E39 M5 two weeks after I got it. Then in the same car (after it was fixed) backed into my aluminum trailer I was too lazy to take back to the trailer park I keep it at.

I tried towing my Corvette back uphill to my house when it broke down, but I tried hooking the trailer hitch of the truck and the frame rail of the vette with a tie down strap. It was ok while I was going straight, but as soon as I turned, it was so close it wedged the front of the vette into the trailer hitch, and nearly ripped the front bumper cover off, luckily, it was cheap gm plastic so it just popped back to form. I had an aftermarket chin spoiler that wasnt so lucky though.

 

I was instucting at a BMW Car Club D/E event at Road America some years ago and had my 930 there to drive/ give rides during the instructor sessions. After the mandatory Drivers meeting at the tower I went out to my car, got settled in, adjusted harness, etc, fired it up and proceeded to run over my tool box - dragged it over the grass and onto the pavement before I realized all that crunching and scraping noise was coming from my car! Then, in utter humiliation had to back it up until the tool box came out from under the car and miss the Instructor session while I jacked up the car and repaired the brake cooling scoop and hose. I'm sure a fair amount of people got a good chuckle out of that - my oldest son tells the story every chance he gets!!

 

could be worse, i thought you might of scratched your cl

 

I agree

 

Ok....The driveway to our garage is on a considerable slope and the garage itself has the normal slope from front to rear. I had a dead battery in the 996 so I go to buy a new one, come home and get in the front trunk to take out the old battery...must have left the car in neutral so when I get in the push starts the car rolling backwards with me in the trunk...I think what the f..then realize, hop out of the trunk and try to hold the car, but it is now part way on the driveway and is picking up speed. I run around and try to get in the door, now going too fast and about to roll across the street and toward the LAKE. Fortunately no cars coming so I run past it and try to stop it from behind, not having much luck as it crosses the street, but when it hits the grass between the street and sidewalk I am able to slow it down and then stop it just on the other side of the walk before the grass slope to the lake. Wife comes out after seeing me through the office window with the look of what are you doing and the two guys cutting my neighbors lawn are getting a good laugh out of my stupidity. I hate my own stupidity most.

 

Lol!

 

+1

I have stupid stories.

 

Hahahaa, I can picture the look on ones face while in the trunk while the car is rolling.

 

keepum coming these stories are getting good. Rons might be the funniest so far. If someone had video taped it, you could have won 10k.