Another cop story
#1
11-10-2003 | 03:10 PM
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From: Del Ray Beach FL
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Another cop story
HAHAHAHAHHAHA... I just had to share this one haha.
While I was driving down the road the other day (going a little faster than I should), I see a cop on the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know about, asked "what's your hurry?"
To which I replied, "I'm late for work."
To which he asked, "What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded.
The cop was surprised and confused. "A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch the hole, until it's about 6 feet."
Then the cop asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six-foot *******?"
To which I politely replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge ..."
Traffic ticket: $95.00
Court costs: $45.00
Look on cop's face ... Priceless
While I was driving down the road the other day (going a little faster than I should), I see a cop on the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know about, asked "what's your hurry?"
To which I replied, "I'm late for work."
To which he asked, "What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded.
The cop was surprised and confused. "A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch the hole, until it's about 6 feet."
Then the cop asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six-foot *******?"
To which I politely replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge ..."
Traffic ticket: $95.00
Court costs: $45.00
Look on cop's face ... Priceless
#7
11-10-2003 | 06:33 PM
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Posts: 657
From: San Francisco Bay area
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A girl friend of mine in high school got pulled over by a cop.
The cop said "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
The my friend said "I know--you're going to invite me to the policeman's ball."
The cop said "policeman don't have *****."
The cop said "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
The my friend said "I know--you're going to invite me to the policeman's ball."
The cop said "policeman don't have *****."
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#12
11-11-2003 | 04:50 PM
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From: Michigan
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Well you must have heard about the guy and his wife who were pulled over and the officer is telling the guy he was doing 85 and the guy keeps arguing with the cop saying "No way I was only doing 65". Well this goes back and forth for a while when the wife has finally had enough. She leans over and says "Officer you should know better than to argue with my Husband when he has been drinking!"
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